| Filk Songs By Others Moaning Myrtle and Some Potion Unbenign are by Caius Marcius Yesterday is by "She Who Must Not Be Named" |
| Moaning Myrtle (from CoS, Chapter 16) (To the tune of Mona Lisa) THE SCENE: The First Floor Girls' Restroom of Gryffindor. Enter HARRY POTTER, Ron Weasley and Prof. Lockhart. HARRY, realizing that Myrtle holds the missing link to the Chamber of Secrets mystery, calls out to her. HARRY Moaning Myrtle, Moaning Myrtle, so we've named you This is Harry Potter 'pon your potty tile Are you roiling in your toilet, 'cause they shamed you, With that Moaning Myrtle sobbing that's your style? Can we be privy to your riddle, Moaning Myrtle? Is there some way to flush away your pain? Secret sorrows often tinkle in your mem'ry Did your dreams end at the U-bend? Are you damp, are you soggy, Moaning Myrtle In your cold and lonely, lovely porcelain? |
| Some Potion Unbenign (from PoA, Chapter 8) (To the tune of Love Potion No. 9) The Scene: REMUS LUPIN'S office. HARRY has a new concern - is SNAPE trying to poison LUPIN? HARRY I took my troubles to Remus Lupin On Grindylows he's giving me the spin But then Snape barged in lookin' totally malign Carryin' a goblet of some potion unbenign I told Lupin about my Boggart fears He's the best teacher we've had in three years But he now seems ill and it must be Snape's design To polish off his rival with some potion unbenign He saw the cup, he picked it up, it's billowing smoke I thought, "This has gotta be some kind of sick joke" Lupin drank the whole thing down as though it were Coke I held my breath, I closed my eyes, I'd thought he'd croak I didn't know if Lupin knew that Snape For the Dark Arts' job is bent out of shape I had a crazy urge to knock aside the stein I don't want him poisoned by some potion unbenign Exit HARRY LUPIN (to SNAPE) I wouldn't know exactly what'd I do Without this complex mixture that you brew Its taste may be bad but lunar fears are left behind Because this werewolf potion helps me preserve my mind HARRY (from without, simultaneous with below) Some potion unbenign Some potion unbenign Some potion unbenign LUPIN & SNAPE (simultaneous with above) Helps me/you preserve my/your mind. |
| Yesterday (A filk by She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named - to the tune of the Beatles' Yesterday) THE SCENE: Unknown. Enter (?) the dis-integrated spirit of VOLDEMORT VOLDEMORT Yesterday, all my troubles were a scar away. Now it seems a boy I could not slay Makes me believe in Yesterday. Suddenly, I'm not half the Lord I used to be, I lack any corporality. Oh, Yesterday came suddenly. Why I had to go I don't know I couldn't say. I cursed somehow wrong, now I long for Yesterday. Yesterday, vice was such an easy game to play. Now I need a place to hide away. Oh, I believe in Yesterday. |
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